Saturday, July 11, 2009

The Mass Went Nuts...



Music: Beck

Hey everyone!.
Just got home. It's like 04:09 in the middle of the night, going to mornin'.

At first, before goin' out I opened my window
and the fresh air welcomed me with chaotic
Limp Bizkit and song "Nookie".
The song is pure gold o'course.
At first I went out in little hippie outfit:
flowery dress over my black rebel jeans
and a leather corsetlike jacket on,
I was wearing simple purple shoes with flowers and small pearls on,
that matched my dress.
And all my hair were in such a damn mess.
When I walked towards our town small sk8park,
I understood a fact,
why the music is so loud.
And good.
In our town is every year "Towndays".
Somekind of several day long festival.
And this year, like the last (I think???.), we had a sk8competition.
I took out some money from my mom's account and went back home.
Changed my clothes. Took some things I needed and off I went.

Our class reunion didn't go like it should in the first place.
I looked others everywhere, but nah.
Then I continued to watch the competition and the ppl around me.
Very interesting and somewhat troublesome.
My jaw dropped constantly against the damn muddy ground.
Yes, the God thought it was good to pee on us.
Again.
And again.
Fuck you!.
Okay.

http://www.saarde-kings.blogspot.com/
I think this is right to do a introduction to those brave youngsters.
This is the page. In Estonian, though.
Bet they drool!.
Why?.
'Cause there were (bmx) riders who were like... W.O.W!!!.
I really enjoyed it.
As well the music and ppl.
Well. Those I know, but still.
Emilie dragged me into a group and I met many new ppl.
And some old ones, who I didn't recognize at first, though.
Some childhood friends and so on.
All younger than me.
Suddenly it occurs me. I didnt even felt like an old fag between them...
Oh well...

Even though I halfly promised myself that I won't start to drink.
I did.
Vodka at first, with some juice.
Then I think.. whiskey?. Beer?. Cider?. And so it went..
I never got drunk, perhaps with the vodka in the begginning.
And everyone else were soooooooo drunk around me.
Funny to see and vitness this kind of foul thing.
With Emilie and one of my best friends little sister we went to a concert.
At first there were local band, ewww.
The guy dosen't even know HOW to play that guitar.
What a shame and waste of an instrument.
Then I suddenly sat there all alone, guarding Emilie's bag.
And the God desided to pee on us. First time on this day.
I sat there and thought:
"I am sitting in the middle of local ppl and some other disgusting fouls.
Wtf am I doing here after all?"

I moved away and lurked everywhere.
Including, playing a deliver gal to one of my best firends Liisa and her friend Jane.
Some cig's and ciders.
Three of us witnessed a crime.
One small and thin girl argued loudly over small monument park.
The guy who she barked at, was taller and seemed to have more might.
He dragged her and treated like she was somekind of a dragdoll.
I and Liisa watched this and talked about it lightly.
I asume and am pretty sure, that if she would've fought back,
or we would gone between them,
she'd be beaten up more later.
Liisa is right: "The self-preservation instinct".

Some so called local "belly-dancers" had a slight show.
Ewww...
And then came the band, for what I payed 100 estonian krones.
Smilers.

The song is "Only For Dreaming" in english.
And it is one of the best from them.
And they played it too.
MHK is happy puppy.
(if everyone wants to know the words in english, lemme know, 'kay?)
^^
They were happy and the mass before the stage went insane and somewhat wild.
All drunk and done.
I jumped my back and feet and every other body part.
Idk how I get myself move, after I wake up.
This happens, when you are used to lay in your bed all day and night long.
'Case you have no fucking else to do in this small depressive town.
(Besides goin' out for a walk with a dog).
(Besides goin' out to shop, to get some groceries and beer for fam).
(Besides goin' out for a walk with Liisa).
(Besides goin' out for a drink and some stupid language games).

Finally I found some of my old classmates.
There were few of us, but the main char's were there.
Thank you, dear
Jorma
Kervin
Triin
Airi
Kadi
Ilona
(I hope I didn't forget anyone).
I lost them in some moments again.
Went with Liisa and Jane to Ankru Bar (Anchor Bar).
A local... yeah. I seem to find no right word to it.
[[ funny scream and laughs toward it. no offence, o'course. ]]
Some punk'n'rollers and other interesting old friends.

After I spent some more time with my old classmates.
It was a reunion after all.
Memememe, Airi, Triin and Kadi witnessed some gang and youngsters show off.
"Oh, let's beat this guys ass. He seems to need that!"
What a stupid fighting ppl.
I went so mad, so Kadi offered me some cider, to "calm" me down.
xD
I seriously was ready to jump in and talk them
outta of this stupid and unnecessary beating argument.
Bahhh.
Do you really have to push your chest into others and show,
who is better male, better and stronger bull.
Well, I tell ya one thing.
None of you, who deal things like this, will never be a true male.
Get over this allready!.

In the middle of this all we spent some more time in sk8park.
And again, everything is so messed up in my head.

Oh. Someone found a youngster, a guy. Perhaps 16-17 years only.
In a drunkcoma.
Ambulance came.
He was awake.
Sort of.
Even the cops showed up.
And those Bulls fled, afraid of themselves.
Most of them underage.
Idk if he was taken away or not.
I hope he is okay.
Somwhat I hope he wasn't local.
Or actually. It dosent damn matter.
This is a young human life we are talking about.

I desided to live one day/night at once.
Not worrying about the next one.
Or the day that might never even come.
I used to know and live like this.
But it seems that as I forgot truth about myself,
I forgot the truth about true way of living.
One day, one moment at the time.
And take it and enjoy it as it is your last.

"Cause I am tired of fighting of lost cause.."
by Beck - Lost Cause

Okay. This is time for my music and some sleep afterwards.
I keep to remembering myself.
One day at the time!.

And it all makes me smile more!.



MHK.
Bruises and broken bones.
xxx

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